does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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