i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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