Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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