i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
