so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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