nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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