why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
