Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
40s are totally the cure
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
