she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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