Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
