She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
