Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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