im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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