she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
