i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize