this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
