I must be too annoying 4 u.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
