The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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