Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize