im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
