For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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