I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
