I wish I could punch you in the face.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
