You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
