her vagine was all disorganized.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
