She is in my trunk
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
