So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
