i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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