I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
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