yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize