I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Randomize
