are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize