Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize