her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
so much tequila, so little girl.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize