why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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