And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
