But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
