? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
