So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
