piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Randomize
