I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize