Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
