woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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