my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
