fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
operation harelip BJ is a go
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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