i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize