He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
