Rock
Scissors
Fuck
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
