all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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