ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
