I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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